feelings Archive

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The Englishman appears to be cold and unemotional because he is really slow

The Englishman appears to be cold and unemotional because he is really slow… When a disaster comes, the English instinct is to do what can be done first, and to postpone the feeling as long as possible. Hence they are splendid at emergencies… It acts promptly and feels slowly. —E. M. Forster,

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Emotion has nothing to do with appropriateness

No—but your whole attitude toward emotion is wrong. Emotion has nothing to do with appropriateness. It matters only that it shall be sincere. I happened to feel deeply. I showed it. It doesn’t matter whether I ought to have felt deeply or not. —E. M. Forster, Notes on the English Character

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For it is not that the Englishman can’t feel—it is that he is afraid to feel

And it is this undeveloped heart that is largely responsible for the difficulties of Englishmen abroad. An undeveloped heart—not a cold one. The difference is important, and on it my next note will be based. For it is not that the Englishman can’t feel—it is that he is afraid to feel. He

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Englishwomen conceal their feelings until after they are married

Englishwomen conceal their feelings until after they are married. They show them then. Oscar Wilde, A Woman of no Importance

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We go home and cry on our own

I think what is British about me is my feelings and awareness of others and their situations. English people are always known to be well mannered and cold but we are not cold—we don’t interfere in your situation. If we are heartbroken, we don’t scream in your face with tears—we go home
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